Mining For Information

There’s an art to knowing when to speak and when to let the person you’re engaging with have the floor. The problem with many people is they don’t know how to shut up. This is particularly the case for guys when they are trying to get a new chick. You have to understand, most females are bombarded with advances every day from many different guys, and most of these guys are hell bent on trying to explain why they are the better choice, failing to realize she’s heard it all before. She already has so much going on that many things you say go in one ear and out the other because once she leaves your presence, another distraction is going to come her way. She’s like a balloon already filled to the max with air, when you try to blow more air into it, what do you think is going to happen? It’s going to burst. Meaning that everything you said as well as what everyone else said is going to get jumbled together, and she won’t be able to differentiate you from the others. That’s why you hear many females say that all guys are the same. It’s not that that’s the truth, but that’s the way it seems because most are taking the same course of action, just adding more air to her already inflated balloon. You first have to deflate all the previous air that has been blown into her head, and then refill her brain with your air. Meaning all the things she’s been through, all the preconceived notions, all the bullshit and baggage from her past must be deflated out of her before you can begin the process of imputing what you want to instill into her. It’s like taking a shower and washing yesterday’s dirt off of today’s body. You don’t want to carry yesterday’s dirt into a fresh new day, and likewise, she doesn’t need to carry old baggage into a new situation because that’s only going to fuck up the chemistry between you two. She’s filled with the air of past relationships, past hurts, past experiences, the past in general, so your first step is getting all of this out of her. You need to know her past, her relationship with her family, her ambitions, her fears, what makes her tick, that’s called deflating her balloon, and there’s an art to doing this. I call it poking holes: Picture a balloon filled with water. Now, imagine someone taking a tiny needle, and poking a hole in the balloon. The water is going to leak out slowly. Now, picture a tire filled with air. Now, picture someone taking a needle to that, the tire now has a slow leak, right? The same principal applies when you’re dealing with a female.

Poke holes and bleed information, sit back and examine the information that will spill from her. Now, understand, information is useless unless you know what to do with it, but I’ll cover that in a bit. You have to ask probing questions or make statements as to her character to get her to open up to you. I’ll give you an example: I was having a conversation with a chick, and I made an observation: “You seem very focused on the vision you have for your life, (Poke), did your parents instill that in you? (Poke) Now, I just gave her a compliment, while at the same time poked a hole to get info on her relationship with her parents. It turns out, their relationship wasn’t what she wanted and needed it to be. She never felt that they supported her enough, thus giving me vital information on how to deal with her. She doesn’t open up to everyone, so she’s letting me in on her inner self.

The words “I understand” go a long way when backed up with some follow up readings on her character. A female wants to feel that you understand the core of who she is, so I hit her with: “One thing I’ve noticed about you is that you’re very outgoing and like to meet new people, but there’s also a part of you that’s reserved and holds back. You’re very selective about whom you let get close to you”, why is that? (Poke, poke, poke). That’s when all types of info came out about the things she’s been through in her life. This opened up the door to past hurts, past joys, and future dreams of hers. Bottom line, I’m in. Understand: It’s her desire to open up to you, but it’s on you to probe and poke holes in the right spot. Once you’ve poked, and she’s spilled the info to you, it never fails, they always say, “I don’t know why I’m telling you all this.” This means you’re in. You now hold a tremendous amount of power in your hands. With many women, especially ones who have been hurt before, it’s not that easy to let someone new in. I’m a believer in Karma, so sit back, be mackish and use the info to build, never to destroy. This is the beginning of understanding the person you’re dealing with so you can interact with them more efficiently thus increasing the odds of a lasting relationship between you two, whatever that relationship may be.

Take a pimp and a hoe type of relationship. The overall goal is money, so it would stand to reason that the more girls you have working for you, the more money you have the potential to make. So, you would want more than one. Many people have a hard time doing this because they either don’t understand leverage or they let their females insecurities get in the way of their expansion. Let me first explain leverage to you and how it relates to your climb and the mindset you have to have and instill in this chick you’re getting money with. If two people were to set out on a trip from Los Angeles to New York and one was walking, and the other on a bike, which would get there first? The person on the bike because he has more leverage. Now, take those same two people and give one a bike and the other a motorbike, who will get there first? The person with the motorbike because he has more leverage. Take those same two people and give one a car and give the other a plane, which will get there first? Get my point? The person with the most leverage, meaning the person who has the most power behind them is the one who will arrive at the destination first. When you have a pimp and hoe type relationship the more legs, you have out there, the more leverage you have in reaching your goal. If she wants to see you win, and she desires to see you on top, there should be no issues here. Once you understand leverage, you increase your odds of winning. Moreover, you have to instill that in the females that you’re dealing with; if they can’t understand that, then you shouldn’t be dealing with them because this is her female insecurity kicking in and it will hold you back, just as it has many would-be pimps. She starts to think she is all he needs, that it’s about the relationship and not the mission. This type of thinking is backwards in that kind of relationship. That’s why so many pimps only have one hoe and are “chilly pimping” meaning they have a girlfriend that just happens to be a stripper or a prostitute. They have no real direction nor do they have a vision; they are living hand to mouth, and if she leaves, he becomes destitute. It’s more of a break-up than it is a business turnover. You see in business there’s always going to be turnover--employees come and go--some stay for years, others for months, but as an employer, you know in certain fields you have to prepare for this; it’s nothing personal. When you have knowledge of leverage and vision, the overall mission has all the value. To the “chilly pimp,” the relationship has all the value. They are like this because they have no knowledge of leverage, have no vision, and let their girl's insecurities limit their expansion. Therefore, they have put the relationship before the mission. You have to understand--the minute the relationship starts to get away from the mission--if adjustments can’t be made to correct this imbalance--you need to get away from the relationship.

Many times it’s because this would-be pimp doesn’t have the insight and understanding of her psychological make-up, nor understanding of how to properly motivate her past her insecurities, and into the proper alignment of the mission that is at hand. He never moves past this low-level status. The blind leading the blind, tragic scenario. Everyone wants to be a part of something great. That’s why when a female experiences a man with an actual vision, an outlook on life, a mission and how to accomplish it and the role he wants her to play in that, it’s like she can finally see what has been missing, even if, before, she couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was. –RulesofLife101 (May 2, 2013) Courtesy of UPA

(You can find more UPA posts here.

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