Using soft words for making hard politics–the Bismarck-style

(I took a lot of liberties in fine-tuning this post because the original poster speaks English as a second language, so he had several grammatical issues. However, I kept the core post.)

“A hard surface and a soft core,” is a saying most of us have already heard of. However, how would it be if we turned the tables and professed “a soft surface and a hard core” instead? That would be a way to come closer to the style of great diplomats and statesmen, guys that have become very rare in our times. One of those great personalities of history, which perfected this style, was the Prussian chancellor--and later chancellor of bigger Germany--Prince Otto von Bismarck.

The iron chancellor

I will admit it right at the beginning: Bismarck has not always been a diplomatic genius. For a big part of his life he had to fight against himself, his impulses, and tame his tongue. This was a tremendous task that took an enormous amount of energy from him. He had a very hot-blooded nature and was notorious in his younger years for his excesses of all kinds. These only disappeared one by one as time passed by. One quote of his--that he found very embarrassing later that he had “blurted” out in a tremendously heated debate in the Prussian parliament in the early 1860s--sticks to the remembrance of Bismarck up to our days: “The great questions of the day will not be settled by means of speeches and majority decisions–that was the mistake of 1848 and 1849 (the German citizen’s revolution–remark made by me)–but by iron and blood!” Nevertheless, it is justified to describe Bismarck’s later style as “using soft words for making hard politics.” For the personal development and the unbelievable discipline he was able to evoke for himself, in all areas of his life (he suffered from more than two dozen chronical diseases for decades) demand our respect, no matter how we personally judge his politics. Bismarck was working so hard on himself, that he matured as a statesman and accomplished something that was considered completely impossible: To unite the German kingdoms and dominions into one big empire–the “Deutsche Reich.” No serious person would ever believe that such a mammoth task could ever have been accomplished by using a “hammer.” Just the opposite is true, the chancellor was cunning enough to get the German princes on his side, and even to turn enemies into friends and allies. In the end, there raised the union of princes, which established the German Empire (the Wilhelminian one–named after the first German emperor Wilhelm I.). Without a doubt, it was the elegance, the wittiness, and the diplomatic genius of Otto von Bismarck that was responsible for this great achievement. It was due to Bismarck’s style to use favorable words for making hard politics–“Realpolitik” as the German word goes--that could be described roughly as “politics dealing with reality” in English.

An incredible ability to transform according to the need of a given situation

One of the outstanding abilities of Bismarck was to mold his style into the necessities of a given situation. Like a chameleon, he was able to adapt to the character and way of being of the people he was dealing with. He even was so skillful that he could make others believe that he would represent a position that was completely opposite of his real convictions. So, other people always thought Bismarck was their ally–a guy that was seeing the world the same way they did. For a liberal, Bismarck was a liberal, for a conservative, he was a conservative, for a monarchist, he was a monarchist, and for a Democrat, he was a Democrat. In his long course of serving as Prussian diplomat (he was Prussian ambassador in Paris, St. Petersburg, and a representative of Prussia to the German Alliance at Frankfurt on Main) he used his position to sharpen his diplomatic weapons--making valuable experiences, and building up his networks. This all came together later in helping him fulfill his great vision of a unified Germany. His most important ally became the Prussian secretary of war (in former times states were courageous enough to name this position that way and were not sissified like our politicians that only dare to use the description “secretary of defense”) Rohn—who, very soon, became Bismarck’s most trusted man within the Prussian government.

What you need to apply the Bismarck-style

First of all, you need a strong consciousness of power in general--and in particular--for the power, you have on your side, and your opponent has on his side. The base of all considerations always has to be the “Realpolitik” (see above)--the ability to see things as they really are, without any blind spots, ideological forces, or the like, and act according to this reality-based style. Furthermore, you have to know your own boundaries and the boundaries of your opponents. Closely connected to this, is the necessity to have enough emotional control to use your emotions to your benefit--instead of letting them run wild and harm you and your interests. This control can only be reached by hard training, exposing yourself to stressful situations, and beating down your weak mind to the degree that it has to reach a new higher level of being. One thing is critical to mention here: “Emotional outbursts” can be a very potent tool in getting what you want in achieving your goals--but like a good actor--you always must have complete control over such “outbursts.” Never fall out of your roll, but on the other side, always know what you want--and go for it--without any excuses and apologies.
Finally, you need what the Germans call “Fingerspitzengefühl”–fingertip-feel when dealing with other people. No matter what most people may think of themselves, human beings are very emotional beings, and all of our actions are fully guided by emotions–without emotions, we would not even be able to act at all; they are the source of our energy to get active. So, don’t blame emotions, they can be your friends--if you know how to use them wisely. Even so-called “cold-blooded” people are emotional in their insides–they only have found out how to avoid making you see it (from the outside). You have to know the dreams and nightmares of others. If you don’t manage to address them, you can be sure that the associations connected to them will address them. Using the right trigger words is very potent when it comes to influencing others. The “soft” Bismarck-style is not so much about saying a lot (let the other person talk all the time, that is completely ok), but saying the right thing at the right time–the words that take away the “armor protection” because they think you are not dangerous, so they have nothing to fear. (In the best case scenario, the person will even consider you as his “friend” or “ally”).

Advantages of the "soft-outside-hard-inside-style."

In general, people will judge you by your outside appearance, the way we behave in public. That is not only true for the first meeting, but it also stays the base of personal judgment, even in long-term relationships. Don’t be deceived by the standard narrative that humans would judge others by their actions. In most cases, that will never be the case. If you are friendly, others will interpret your behavior as a result of their own being (for most people are extremely self-centered nowadays). People tend to even disclose private things and information that usually would only be given to very intimate others. Moreover, your actions will hardly ever be watched at all.
Words can be used wonderfully to hide actions. That is the main application of words in modern politics. However, apart from that, it serves us very well in private venues too.
We avoid using the evil word “no” which very easily can cause a lot of friction in our times.
Another advantage of the Bismarck-style is that it is not expected in--most cases--at all. Very few people ever act “softly” when they are about to win an argument or are pursuing their goals. Softness is usually interpreted as weakness and vulnerability, but--the truth is--it is more like water: water can adapt to every shape, can be molded in whatever you want, always penetrates everything, and always goes the way it wants to go while staying true to itself. To adapt to a given situation has nothing to do with giving up your goals or ambitions. The opposite is true. The Bismarck-style will provide you with an advantage over your fellow-man, and will even include an element of surprise. Apart from some professionals (diplomats, statesmen, lawyers and the like), there are very few that are familiar with this strategy. In most cases, you will be unbeatable, and that alone is worth applying this style. -Oliver Maerk, Courtesy of Freedom, Power, and Wealth (November 17, 2015)

(You can read more of Oliver Maerk’s posts at the aforecited link. You can also pickup his book here.)

(Disclosure: This website may be compensated for sales of products linked to.)

(If you enjoyed this post, then please consider subscribing to stay up-to-date with my latest postings and sharings. Also, please share and support Worldly Game.)